Sizzled out joy

I think I’ve always lived by the saying “brace yourself as you fall”...often listening to the seemly obvious lies the devil plants in your mind to just eat away at any kinda of hope growth there is. Like the tiniest mineral of joy or the microscopic moment of heightened feelings of possibility.

It’s pretty sad when I think about it how long I’ve just let Satan put out the embers of hope in my life. Letting them simmer down to ash as I just continue on keeping my expectations at an unhealthy level. 

But what’s most interesting is I’ve got tons of hope and happiness for others but just not for myself. I’m kinda like the little peanuts character dragging his blanket around I’m just dragging my bag of low expectations and moments of disappointment. Basically like the reverse of Christmas.

I remember this one moment in college where I was at the lowest emotional place, where I had lost love and was letting Satan just steal all the little joys in my life to make me miserable all the time....and I found myself at a conference singing the chorus of a song that said “you are my joy” over and over and over again. Proclaiming Jesus as my joy repeatedly. And at that moment I could just feel the embers of years of flames of joy just start raging within me at a level that was so enthusiastic nothing could touch it. Nothing could steal it. No one could put it out.

The raging fire within was finally beating as steady flames again. Warming life, filling voids and bringing beauty out of the ashes of life.

This is where we start and the true authentic birthing of life should be lives. It's where we remember that Jesus conquered death and can surely conquer whatever your struggling with in whatever moment you find yourself.

I hope even if my words can't encourage you than this verse from Romans 8:26-28 will;

“Meanwhile, the moment we get tired in the waiting, God’s Spirit is right alongside helping us along. If we don’t know how or what to pray, it doesn’t matter. He does our praying in and for us, making prayer out of our wordless sighs, our aching groans. He knows us far better than we know ourselves, knows our pregnant condition, and keeps us present before God. That’s why we can be so sure that every detail in our lives of love for God is worked into something good.”

-jdw